As a parent, it can be overwhelming to navigate the ups and downs of raising your little ones. As parents, we don’t need added difficulties in the department of raising children, so those that suffer from mental health problems are fighting another battle altogether. More often than not, it’s not only the parent who suffers, but also the child (and this is where the cycle of abuse / violence./ neglect continues—or is born).
If you are mindful of nothing other than that fact alone, then you are off to a better start that many. Being mindful takes work, but being a mindful parent takes discipline.
A Simple Exercise as an Example
There are certain moments in time that have a larger impact on us than others. That impact can be either positive or negative, and it’s these moments that help shape the person we are to become. Don’t believe me? Think back to when you were a child. I would like you to think about the times you wished your parents either did, or did not, do something that really would have mattered to you then. How did you feel? Granted, usually these critical moments are negative ones, and correlate with trauma—others, can be great. We tend to remember the bad times more than the good. When you were reminiscing, what moment did your mind take you back to? See.
Mindfulness 101: Why Being Present Matters So, why do we need mindfulness in the first place? Well, being present is like having a magic cape that saves you from feeling overwhelmed. It’s about being fully engaged with your little ones, and by extension, creating a more loving and supportive family environment. Here are some awesome benefits of being mindful:
- Listen like a pro: No more distracted Mom (or Dad) – we’re talking active listening here!
- No more multitasking madness: Give your child your undivided attention, and they’ll do the same for you.
- Show empathy and understanding: Because who doesn’t love being understood?
Mistakes Happen: How to Repair Relationships with a Side of Forgiveness Oops! Mistakes will happen – it’s like, totally normal. But what we need to do is learn how to fix them in a way that works for everyone. Here are some tips on how to repair relationships:
- Apologize and mean it: Take responsibility for your actions (even if it’s just admitting you were wrong).
- Listen without getting defensive: Give your child space to express themselves, and try not to get all fired up.
- Show empathy and understanding: Be that cool parent who gets it.
Every Action Matters: Being mindful that every interaction with your child could, and will, change the outcome of their future. Being mindful of your own actions and responses to your child, no matter how tough things are right now. To a child, as I am sure you can recall; Everything matters.
- If you are upset, tired, or irritated from your day: Before a knee jerk response to your child’s needs, think back to a time that you wished your parents would have done something—no matter how large or small—different. Take a deep breath, focus, and then react.
- Foundations matter: Many of the bad habits or nuances that we have today step from moments in our childhood. Nearly all of what crafts the foundation, core-beliefs, likes and dislikes are influenced either directly taught or indirectly learned by behaviors—also directly and indirectly. Be mindful of your own self before passing on traits that you may not like about yourself. It’s up to you to instill a positive foundation that will help your child flourish in life.
Patience: The Magic Cure for Overwhelm Let’s talk about patience (or the lack thereof). We’ve all been there – feeling frazzled and frustrated with our tiny humans. But what if I told you that patience is a superpower? Here are some tips on how to practice patience:
- Take a deep breath: Before reacting, take a moment to breathe and calm down.
- Count to 10 (or 20): Give yourself time to think before responding.
- Prioritize self-care: You can’t pour from an empty cup, people!
Mistakes Happen: How to Repair Relationships with a Side of Forgiveness Oops! Mistakes will happen – it’s totally normal. But what we need to do is learn how to fix them in a way that works for everyone. Here are some tips on how to repair relationships:
- Apologize and mean it: Take responsibility for your actions (even if it’s just admitting you were wrong).
- Listen without getting defensive: Give your child space to express themselves, and try not to get all fired up.
- Show empathy and understanding: Be that cool parent who gets it.
Forgive Yourself (and Others) Let’s be real – forgiving ourselves can be super hard. We beat ourselves up over silly mistakes, or get stuck in guilt-town for way too long. But here’s the thing: self-compassion is key to healing and moving forward! Here are some tips on how to practice self-forgiveness:
- Let go of guilt and shame: You’re not perfect (and that’s totally okay).
- Focus on today: Instead of dwelling on yesterday’s mistakes, create a better tomorrow for yourself.
- Develop a growth mindset: We learn from our mistakes, people!
Creating a Safe Space: How to Get Your Child Talking Last but not least, Want to hear your little ones’ deepest thoughts and feelings? It starts with creating an environment where they feel safe sharing everything. Here are some tips on how to get the conversation flowing:
- One-on-ones only: Schedule quality time with each child (even if it’s just 15 minutes).
- Active listening, please: No phones or distractions here – give your child your undivided attention.
- No judgments allowed: Be that cool parent who gets it.
You Got This! That’s it for today, fellow parents! Remember that you have the power to create a happier, more loving family environment by prioritizing self awareness while being mindful as to not pass on any negativity from your past onto your little ones.
