I am going to kick off a series that may hit home for a lot of folks. Its about the damage that too much love can cause your child in the long run. Like any story that I am hit with, this woke me up at 4:30 in the morning after a night of meditating about my in-laws, and the damage that being an over-protective parent can do. Like many, I am doing all I can to keep a pair of adult men who were never taught how to care for themselves from showing up at my door in their early 40’s, looking for a place to live. But my frustration doesnt compare the the amount of suffering that my wife is enduring. Like any supportive spouse, I know that in order to help, I need to understand, so allow me to share what I have learned in this series in hopes it can help you, as well. . . But first, a story. . .

The Love Birds

In a land not so far away, and a time not long ago, there was a nest high in a great tree, and In this nest lived a family of Love Birds. Now, Love Birds aren’t like other birds. You see, they are Love Birds, and what makes Love Birds so special is because love is what a Love Bird do best.

Not long after Mama and Papa Bird built their nest, three perfect eggs appeared, making the nest a true home. In the beginning, they were like any bird family, chirping and cheeping and doing all the ordinary bird things.

The chicks grew. They made friends with the breezes and the leaves. When early summer warmed the branches, new flocks began to soar and dive in the wide, blue sky. But these were uncertain times. High above, hawks circled. Deep below, silent cats prowled. Many birds who did not pay attention were sadly lost.

Mama and Papa Bird, however, paid more attention than most. Their love was so strong, so deep, that they feared the world beyond the nest. Instead of teaching their young to fly, they kept them safe under their wings. They spent their days gathering all the food themselves, for the younglings could not yet go out to gather their own.

As the chicks grew, the nest felt smaller with each passing day. Then, one of the younglings—now not so young—caught the eye of another bird building a nest in the very same tree. Before long, she had a family of her own. Being a Love Bird, she showered her mate with more love than she ever dreamed she had, filling their new nest with joy. Her love bird taught her how to fly, how to care, and how to love in ways she had never known. She began to feel as free as every other bird in the sky.

Joy kept winning the day for her. But back in the old nest, Mama and Papa Bird grew tired, and then they grew sick. The two other younglings, still safely tucked inside, did not know how to help or care for them.

So, Sister Bird flew back to help. She left her own warm nest cold and lonely each night. But being a Love Bird, she gave more to others than she kept for herself, and she found a quiet happiness in that.

Yet, the weight of caring for two nests—her own, and the one from her youth—became heavy. It began to weigh on her wings and her heart. The other younglings wanted to help, but they did not know how. All they had ever known was the love from Mama and Papa Bird, not how to love themselves.

Before long, Sister Bird grew sick from the heavy load. Her own love bird had to carry her weight, doing the work of two to keep both nests safe. This broke Sister Bird’s heart, for Love Birds are born to love and care for others, not to be a burden.

In time, Mama and Papa Bird passed on. But that was not the truest tragedy. For still in the old nest were two birds with wings that had never learned to fly. With the Brother Birds unable to care from themselves, nature, in time returned them to Mother Earth.

Sister Bird slowly recovered, her strength returning on the wind. But her heart remained with the old nest, her thoughts on the love that swallowed a family, and the wings that never had a chance to fly.

In the end, Sister Bird taught her younglings not of the Love her Parents taught, but of the lessons that Love had taught, and spend the rest of her days souring through the sky with her family.

-Joshua M. Goth 12/29/25